Hugs and Heart Space

This picture was taken at my wedding in May sixteen years ago this month. I don't have a picture of our hug on Mother's Day. There were tears then, too.

We are being asked to social distance to help prevent the spread of coronavirus. I haven’t seen my mother-in-law or extended family since lockdown began. I am working from home and doing my part while at times feeling overwhelmed.

Being away from a loved one and not knowing when we will see each other again is painful.

The words below are meant as an offering. While pain and discomfort may not go away, I continually discover and practice ways to feel my own experience with compassion and see with as much clarity as possible, moment to moment, and day by day.

I invite you to gently rest your awareness on your heart center and imagine this:

The heart’s electromagnetic field encompassing three feet around your body, one arms’ length. Imagine the connection between your arms and your heart, as well as, your lungs. Imagine the energy of your heart permeating the earth we all share. Imagine the distance between us bridging through our connection to the earth and across the sky.

When social distancing began, we were instructed: six feet apart, two arms’ length between individuals.

Imagine you are practicing social distance, six feet away from another person. Their heart space is three feet as is yours. Six feet of heart space between you. Heart spaces close without physical contact.

Now, imagine when you share an embrace with another, both of you being inside the entirety of this shared heart space.

When we remain six feet apart, or further which is the case for many, we have the space to fully inhabit and feel our individual heart space.

How does your heart feel? How does your body feel in this space? Moment to moment and day by day?

Can you feel your connection to another within this space apart? Do you feel a connection through time and space?

Imagine a time and place you have felt crowded in a shared space. How did that experience affect you in the moment and upon reflection?

The most crowded I have felt was at Mardi Gras Carnival in La Paz when I was sixteen. Near the carnival rides, there were waves of people. I felt like I was moving in unison with the crowd. We were body to body and moving as one. Too close for comfort. When I feel crowded, often it takes some time to feel centered and spacious again. I find the practice of slow breathing and listening to the sound of my own breath to be grounding.

Now, there is tape on the floors in public buildings. I have been advised to do the same in our yoga studio. Giving our fellow humans space is now mandatory. Imagine a time and place where social distance becomes a norm where we can breathe openly within our individual and collective spaces. We are being trained to feel six feet of space between us. If the term ‘social distance’ doesn’t resonate with you, what might you call a sense of spaciousness and ease between beings?

In the words of Frank Lloyd Wright, "Space is the breath of art."

How can we be in this ever changing space and breathe calmly with ourselves and others?

Hugs are and will be more appreciated than ever. Shared heart space is a privilege. This is your personal space.

Hugs release oxytocin, lowering your heart rate, reducing anxiety and the effects of stress on the body, mind and spirit. Feeling love and loved strengthens your heart. Beauty fuels the spirit and enlivens the lungs. Immunity.

I am fortunate to be in lockdown with three family members and there are hugs every day. My mom is in her own home. I have seen her a few times. Hugging was not invited until mother’s day when she said, “I’m doing hugs”. We all piled in and hugged my mom.

When you can’t hug your own mom and you know she is alive and well, but doing what feels best for her, you respect that and still, nothing in the world feels quiet right.

"Give up waiting as a state of mind. When you catch yourself slipping into waiting, come into the present moment. Just be and enjoy being." ~ Eckhart Tolle

I designed and own a building; a place for wellness and healing. Closing the doors and not using this space for its purpose felt maddening. How is it possible that the services we offer are not rendered essential and we cannot use the place when the world might benefit the most?

I reframe and refresh my perspective. We have practiced for hours to years together. It is time to take our practices home. We can connect through space, on and offline.

In architecture, we create tangible space. In yoga and meditation, we create tangible and ineffable space. There are many ways to come home to ourselves. The building exists, yet we do not have to be there to practice together. When we can gather, our time will be more special than ever. 

Hearts entrain, near and far, beating together through the pulse of the earth and air in the sky.

This time, like all, ever lived and forevermore, is temporary. Change is the only constant.

I am not waiting. I am alive and breathing. I am feeling this space and remembering, we are all connected, heart to heart, worldwide.

When I feel overwhelmed, I feel my feet touching the earth, the air on my skin and breathe into this heart space.  

In the Celtic tradition, when you take someone into the care of your own heart, that gives you the right to offer them a blessing. Blessings start with the word 'may'...may I, may you, may we, may all beings. It is encouraged to practice the art of blessings, starting with writing and offering a blessing for yourself.

At this time, what blessing would you love to offer your own heart, body, mind and soul?

I wrote the blessing below while I was in Ireland several years ago. I wrote the words for myself. Today, I offer them to you:

May you remember 

the peace, love and ease

always near and dear

nestled safely within

the boundless contours

of your own heart.

Tehroma